Monday, November 28, 2005

Concerns re Donor’s Desire for Contact

My parents watched last Sunday’s live interview on CNN with Wendy and Ryan Kramer regarding the DSR. Besides my parent's views that finding half siblings will only complicate our lives they were concerned with the possibility that the donor would want to make contact with my kids and how that would affect my relationship (emotional and legal) to the kids.

Where the DSR does have about 200 plus donors registered as being interested in making contact with offspring it’s still quite rare and I expect our donor is not interested. That is not say that he has not checked out the Registry to see if he has helped bring any kids into the world. Heck, I’d be curious if I was him. But I don’t expect to learn that a match was made on the DSR between our donor and us. I admit I am hoping this never occurs.

How would I react if this did occur? Shock I guess at first. Would I feel a measure of being threatened? I’d be less than truthful if I said absolutely not. But I know my kids are my kids and I am their daddy so any fears would be softened by that knowledge.

It would certainly bring up the issues sooner to determine what the three year old truly understands. At this point due to the ages of my kids I certainly would allow no contact with my kids but I would inquire as to what if anything the donor is interested in pursuing and I would ask for more detail as to why he did become a donor.

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