As soon as I saw the front page of today's "am New York" newspaper I wondered what my children will think when they see images like this? The article discusses how in these hard economic times the number of individuals interested in donating for money has risen.
Back to my kids I wonder whether my kids will think, their donor, their biological father, simply donated to make a buck? How will that thought affect them.
7 comments:
Well, I'm pretty certain that is the underlying reason our donor donated. He was a student and he did have a nice blurb about wanting to help a couple that couldn't have children realize their dream of a family. While I would love to believe that was his main motivation I'm sure if there wasn't compensation he probably wouldn't have done it. That being said I don't things like this will make my child feel warm and fuzzy about his conception.
From personal experience it's not a nice thought knowing that you were "sold" away.
I agree with Damian - the idea of being "sold" in the first place is the most disturbing.
My biological father most likely also donated for money, probably as a senior in college and medical/graduate student for seven years. However, most of these men are not counseled on the consequences of their donations, and even if he was a medical student, sperm becomes so medicinalized and the conceptualization of procreating to a 21 year old male, it's possible that he didn't even realize what it entitled.
Maybe I'm trying to rationalize his behavior, but I can't help to wonder what his motivations were.....
I was bought and sold as a commodity before I was born. Now, 29 years into the arrangement, I think I got the better end of the deal.
He got cash, my parents got a kid, I got to be me. See, I profited from all of their actions, regardless of their motivations. Go me. Raise your kids with a good perspective on life, that someone always has it worse and that we're all lucky to be alive for another day.
Also, Eric, I broached the subject of donor conception with my sister today. For the most part, she agrees with me, that it's actually pretty awesome to be born this way.
Oh yeah, and the twins were born, hence my recent absence.
It's great reading through some of the comments. Of course, there's always the question of whether donors should or should not be paid. It would be great if more people donated for altruistic reasons.
Bea
The way I see it, Bea, the money is, in effect, a pittance paid to signify the severing of parental claim on the behalf of the donor, weighted by the difficulty and inconvenience of donation.
For instance, it would take me maybe a month to donate, but my wife would take months of uncomfortable treatments and... some... procedure... in order to donate.
Altruism would be a great motivation, but I wouldn't expect it from anyone. With the donors getting paid, at least everything "evens out", y'know?
The situation is different here in the UK - as the most you can claim is £250 for ten donations - which actually works out to at least 12 visits to the clinic when you include the initial assessment and final blood screening. I 'lost money' after taking time off work etc.
I hope you don't mind me posting :) Reading a different perspective helped me make my mind up to donate - so thank you!
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