Mandatory Donor Conception Workshops ? Voluntary?

Over the years I have often referred to my children's DI conception as analogous to a half adoption. The term allows people to see the similarities between the two communities with respect to various issues. One of the issues I have discussed before is how couples / individuals looking to adopt have usually been required to go through an interview process and very often some sort of educational seminar or workshop prior to an adoption being granted. I have often wondered why the use of donor conception methods does not require a similar process. 

The answer lies I suspect in the fact that in the adoption process the child already exists, has rights, and the State has an obligation to ensure the child is placed with an individual or family best suited for that adoption. In cases where donor conception is chosen, it is being used very often to overcome infertility issues or the fact the couple (gay/lesbian) cannot obviously procreate without the use if third party gametes and here there is no child who rights and safety must be currently safeguarded by the State. 

Should cryobanks / clinics require some sort of counseling or information sessions prior to starting DC procedures? Perhaps. Some offer information or counseling in some form but I am unaware if it is mandatorily required by any such institution currently. Certainly no US state health law requires it that I know of. Let me know if your state does. 

My own view is I wish there was some requirement. How it would be administered, signed off on, I cannot say but I would expect the experience would shift the paradigm from donor conception from being used as an infertility mask to a opportunity for the potential parents to understand the issues and possible ramifications / questions / issues that the donor conceived individuals may face in their lives. 

The UK Donor Conception Network offers such a seminar that I did not realize existed.  I would love to see such seminars adapted here by local chapters of the American Fertility Association or Resolve.  

http://www.dcnetwork.org/workshop/preparation

Do I expect legislation or regulations here in the US to require such seminars to be in parity with local adoption laws? Unlikely. Medical establishments and cryobanks want no roadblocks to easy use of DC as simply a treatment option and want little or no contact with any additional red tape. 

Should such seminars be encouraged? Yes. To require them to be mandatory? Unlikely it will ever happen but I would vote Yay. There are simply to many benefits to the adults and to the children of knowledgeable and loving parents. 

Kung Fu Panda 2 - Importance of Bloodlines in a Family ?

In Kung Fu Panda 2, the story involves Po's (jack Black) examining his relationship with his dad and the importance (or non-importance) of bloodlines in a family.

You can guess then that I am interested in taking my kids to see this film to see their reactions to this plot line and use it as a tool to further a discussion of what they understand about families.

But alas, neither child (ages 9 and 7) wants to see the movie. If I force them to go that would not help so I am stuck wondering.

Has anyone taken their kids and discussed this part of the story with their kids? Did anyone who saw the movie even realize this was part of the story? How was it addressed? I am curious for feedback.

The reviews I am reading here on Common Sense indicate the adoption story line may be a bit intense for younger children and the bad guy is truly bad and the film is much darker than the first one.

Perspective: "Why I have to legally adopt my own son"

Because I used to write this blog daily I am subscribed to several news alerts when articles are published regarding donor conception. Today I received a link to the above headline published by Salon yesterday on-line. I guess any topic depends on your perspective. When I first read the headline I figured it was voiced by a DI Dad like me. I was wrong.

The article is actually written by a new DI Mommy but one who is one half of lesbian couple where the non-bio parent has to adopt the child to be seen as its parent. The same thing happens to men in many states but in this case the article is written from the female perspective. Luckily for me being a NYS resident at the time of my children's birth and being legally married to their mom at that time I had no such requirement. I was considered their natural father despite the biological aspects that I am not.

Realistically the NYS law and the laws of states like it are such that there is no documentation anywhere filed with the state that states I am anything other than a natural parent. I recall something that the papers we signed with the clinic are required to be kept to complete the legalities but dont recall why at this very moment as no one ever said we would need them to prove parentage on my part. My only requirement that I know is as I stated above.

Again perspective is everything when reading headlines on this topic.

NY Times Blog: “Relative Choices”

The subtitle for the NY Times blog “Relative Choices” is “Adoption and the American Family”. As Bill Cordray has been stating for many years a number of issues confronting the donor conceived mirror those addressed by the adoption community. Each day that I read this blog I wish that issues surrounding donor conception were addressed openly in an international forum such as the New York Times. I recommend this blog heartily for anyone with an interest in this area.

I have written or rather tried to write the appropriate party at the New York Times to ask if this blog could be expanded to address donor conception in some manner. I have had no luck so far even determining who that person may be. Even once a week or even two weeks would be a great start. Certainly there are many blogs out whose focus is donor conception and each them is worthy of national attention for the issues they address. But somehow I think if the NY Times can be persuaded to include donor conception to their blog it would be a great step forward in recognizing the issues confronting donor conceived individuals and their families.

I have thought of creating a new blog which would hopefully draw from the wide field of advocates in the donor community where their opinions, stories, and thoughts could be brought together in one place apart from their standard platforms which could be used as a Journal much like the Relative Choices blog. If you think this a worthwhile endeavor and I will pursue it.