Tuesday, January 10, 2006

Having Another Donor Conceived Child?

My wife and I would very much want to have more children. Our decision not to is not DC related but a financial one. Living with two kids in NYC is not cheap and to add another would not help. And this does not even address the cost of a DI cycle here in NYC which could run between $1500-$2000.

I have wondered what solace if any donor conceived persons get from their full siblings that aids them in their times of identitiy crisis. Of the DCPersons I have met a few had siblings but I have heard little of whether this is a help or a neutral factor. When we had our son we purchased enough vials to ensure that we would be able to conceive at least one sibling as we knew we wanted to ensure he had at least one full sibling in the world who shared his genes, history (albeit part through Mom, part adopted through me, and then part missing) and a common point of reference, us, their parents.

Again as there are far to few studies out there of the mental affects of DC there are far less dealing with the benefits to the DCPersons of having at least one full or half sibling out there.
We still toy with the idea of a third child but like any normal family it first comes down to money which is sad but perhaps for the best as there are too many unanswered questions that are far more important than money (or even just our desire to have more kids.)

1 comment:

Ameliasmama2000 said...

I have given the topic of full siblings a great deal of thought and I concluded that having a full sibling is a plus IF its possible. If its not then carry on in what ever way makes sense for your family.

I went to great lengths to try and have another child with the same donor as my first because it was important to me, but I was not successful. Now I am deciding by which non traditional (DE/DS, adoption, DOnor Embryo) means I will add to my family and there are many choices! Ultimately I know my child will be fine as an only just as she would love having a sibling in our home by whatever method we get one.

For what its worth, if I were married I would go for the third IF I could. When you life is nearing the end I doubt you would ever regret the vacations you didn't take or the other extras you skipped in order to afford another child.

Just my 2 cents

Julia, mama to Amelia age 5 yrs via DI